Fair warnings

Occasionally, I’m asked I’m a particular Lance Leonard.

I’ll admit to being a Lance Leonard, but perhaps not the Lance Leonard you’re looking for. (“Haven’t you heard? I come in six-packs.”)

For example, I am *not*:

• A conservative politician from New Jersey. (You’ve likely reversed the names, not to mention the, well, never mind. It’s not that sort of site.)

• Formerly of any confection or beverage companies; the email addresses are close, but different. Please look again.

  And, since the subject’s been broached… Dude. It’s embarrassing to receive someone else’s private correspondence—especially correspondence that really should remain, well, private.

  The senior executives of my acquaintance usually know someone who can help them obtain unique digital identities. Has your mileage varied? ‘Nuff said?

• In the insurance game. Nope; I’m a technical guy…a geek through and through. And I’ve got the funny-shaped dice to prove it.

• Dead…at least not yet. That may change at some point and I cannot guarantee that I’ll be able to update the site accordingly.

You’ve been warned.

I suppose I should admit that I’ve:

• Been to New Jersey (Still miss footlongs on the waterfront)
• Lived in California (Santa Cruz, if you must know)
• Done project work for a notable beverage company
• Worked for a life insurance/investment company
• Played dead on stage

But those are all meaningless coincidences typical in a life of adventure. None of them mean I’m the guy you’re looking for. Nope. Nuh-uh. I didn’t do it. No one saw me do it. Can’t prove a thing. Pay no attention to the geek behind the content. You can go about your business. Move along. Move along.

Oh, one last thing… Even if I might be the guy you think you’re looking for, I very probably can’t help you locate the person you lost track of way back when.

Life is frequently weird. The once-possible sometimes becomes the opportunity-missed, the forever-broken, the legally-constrained, the ethically-restrained, and so on.

As certain a Formican once noted repetitiously, “Change happens.” Roll with it.

More plainly: If I say I cannot help you, I probably can’t…and I may not be in a position to explain why. Please respect that.

And, yes, my sense of humor has been influenced by Douglas Adams, Charles Addams, Harlan Ellison, Monty Python, Leslie Charteris, Neil Gaiman, Terry Prachett, Piers Anthony, and more. Why do you ask?